July 31st, 2011
Check out how this cat walks across the room…
July 30th, 2011
July 29th, 2011
July 28th, 2011
Irish Declare War On France:
The French President, is sitting in his office when his telephone rings.
“Hallo, Mr. Sarkozy!” a heavily accented voice said. “This is Paddy down at the Harp Pub in County Clare, Ireland. I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you!”
“Well, Paddy,” Sarkozy replied, “This is indeed important news! How big is your army?”
“Right now,” says Paddy, after a moment’s calculation, “there is meself, me cousin Sean, me next door neighbour Seamus, and the entire darts team from the pub. That makes eight!”
Sarkozy paused. “I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 100,000 men in my army waiting to move on my command.”
“Begoora!” says Paddy. “I’ll have to ring you back.”
Sure enough, the next day, Paddy calls again. “Mr. Sarkozy, the war is still on. We have managed to get us some infantry equipment!”
“And what equipment would that be Paddy?” Sarkozy asks.
“Well, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Murphy’s farm tractor.”
Sarkozy sighs amused. “I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 6,000 tanks and 5,000 armored personnel carriers. Also, I have increased my army to 150,000 since we last spoke.”
“Saints preserve us!” says Paddy. “I’ll have to get back to you.”
Sure enough, Paddy rings again the next day. “Mr. Sarkozy, the war is still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We have modified Jackie McLaughlin’s ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four boys from the Shamrock Bar have joined us as well!”
Sarkozy was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. “I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 100 bombers and 200 fighter planes. My military bases are surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I have increased my army to 200,000!”
“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!” says Paddy, “I will have to ring you back.”
Sure enough, Paddy calls again the next day. “Top o’ the mornin’, Mr. Sarkozy! I am sorry to inform you that we have had to call off the war.”
“Really? I am sorry to hear that,” says Sarkozy. “Why the sudden change of heart?”
“Well,” says Paddy, “we had a long chat over a few pints of Guinness, and we decided there is no fookin’ way we can feed 200,000 prisoners.”
July 27th, 2011
“So,” Peter asks the first guy, “how many times did you cheat on your wife?”
“None. I had a perfect marriage.”
“Only twice, I think,” says the second guy.
“12 times. Maybe 13,” says the third guy.
“Okay,” says Peter. “You get a rusty Ford.”
“I just saw my wife.”
“She was riding a skateboard.”
July 26th, 2011
Great comedy. This guy does very funny magic tricks along with his musical little dog.
Check him out…
July 25th, 2011
Thomas Jefferson was a history student of failed governments around the world over the centuries. Here are some quotes that show what Jefferson and others discussed and then put into our Constitution.
These quotes are very sobering when thinking of our current state of affairs here in America. Thanks to my friend Mark Young at Baby Boomer Talk Online for these quotes:
“I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them.”
“My reading of history convinces me that most bad government results from too much government.”
“It is incumbent on every generation to pay its own debts as it goes. A principle which if acted on would save one-half the wars of the world.”
“The democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not.”
“To compel a man to subsidize with his taxes the propagation of ideas which he disbelieves and abhors is sinful and tyrannical.”
“The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants.”
July 24th, 2011